I made what might be a horrid mistake today... I decided to engage Kheper in conversation about himself. It is definitely a topic he enjoys! Who would have thought such a small insect body could house such a giant ego. Still, it wasn't all preening... I learned quite a bit about him and Ahmose. Apparently, Ahmose created him as a way to reach the gods and, well, pester them, I suppose. Kheper thinks he was trying to taunt Ma'at into ripping his soul apart and ending his existence, or possibly just convincing the gods to release him. Dear me, when I think about it, it must have been a very sad and depressing existence. And to think he had Kheper there with him the whole time... I certainly know I wouldn't have minded getting my soul ripped apart by a monstrous crocodile god!
So help me, there I was on Broadway, waiting for a bus, and I get it in my head to talk to Kheper again. For fun. I must be insane.
This time, I asked him a bit about the old gods and what Ahmose thinks of them, etc. I guess Ahmose is even more of a traditionalist than I realized... Kheper says he really does believe all that stuff about rules and curses and judgment in the afterlife. That's why he gets so frustrated with me. I don't know, maybe I'm just weird, but not wanting my heart to be consumed by an ancient crocodile god of the Egyptian afterlife is actually kind of sweet.
I asked Kheper about Ahmose himself, what he was really like. Did you know he could have used the Book of Thoth to put the curse on someone else and walk free? The fact he didn't do that was pretty noble, though Kheper says he was a bit of an ass about it. Still, you can be an ass while still being a genuinely good person. Heck, I think half the people I associate with would fall under that category.
So help me, I somehow thought it would be a good idea to ask if Ahmose liked me. Not in that way! But like that stopped Kheper. According to him, Ahmose is almost constantly bugging him with questions, worrying about me, asking if he was too cruel to me, and so on. I'd almost think he DID like me in that way... argh, now I'm thinking like Kheper!